Thursday, September 22, 2011


“There’s no way to win with NTs. It’s been proven that most people are better friends with people close by to them, but if *you* do it, it’s pathological. Most people make friends based on common interest, but if you do that, you’re calculatingly selecting friends for their “utility”. Even if you say “I love you” verbally out loud they’ll just call it echolalia (see “autism every day”).” - a comment on someone’s facebook, I guess I should keep it anonymous, unless the writer requests credit. but I really liked it.

Everything we do is medicalized, even when it’s the same as everyone else does.

Wednesday, August 31, 2011
I’ve been disturbed to see dynamics emerge where people create the new poly norm and then hate themselves if they cannot live up to it. If they are not perfect at being non-jealous, non-threatened, and totally delighted by their partners’ exploits immediately then they have somehow failed. I have felt this way myself. Frustrated at how my intellect can embrace this approach to sex and yet my emotional reaction is sometimes enormous and undeniably negative. At times, this has become a new unachievable perfection I use to torture myself, embarrassed even to admit to friends how awful I feel when overcome by jealousy, and becoming increasingly distant from partners as I try to hide these shameful and overwhelming feelings. This doesn’t seem like the radical and revolutionary practice I had hoped for. In fact, it feels all too familiar, like the other traumas of growing up under capitalism—alienation from myself and others, constant insecurity and distrust and fear, self-hatred and doubt and inadequacy.

Dean Spade, For Lovers and Fighters (via tgstonebutch)

Dean Spade is probably my favorite human.

(via hickiesandhotpants)


(via waxpapereyes)
Sunday, August 14, 2011 Sunday, August 7, 2011 Friday, July 22, 2011 Thursday, June 2, 2011


The idea that people cannot find (do not deserve) love, particularly true or perfect love, if they are ‘broken’ or ‘damaged’ is in fact quite common in this society. Many people happily parrot this idea along with self-helpy jargon like needing to love yourself before you seek love. Which is a reminder to broken people, to people who may hate themselves for whatever reason, that they don’t deserve love (we don’t deserve so many things…to live, to speak, to have opinions…).

It is also particularly common to claim that people with mental illness, some diagnoses in particular, are inherently bad and dangerous and harmful and shouldn’t be in relationships/don’t deserve love because they will just hurt people. People have told me to my face at feminist conferences that people with my diagnoses are damaging and dangerous and shouldn’t be allowed to have relationships. Human connections. 

The idea of denying love to any human being repulses me. The idea of proudly crowing that you feel some human beings don’t deserve love, or friendship, can never find these things, because they are ‘sick’…it’s not particularly new or revolutionary. 

(Source: se-smith)

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Poem, Written August 4 2010


The arch curling round
bracing around what is surely
those absences society sees in us
the lack- they say lack
lack, a word with so much of saying
that there is something that
should must be there
but isn’t-
of eyes touching
easy embrace
the societally explained expectations
that lead only to disappointment
when pursued-
in my experience at least.

Instead there is that space
of each of us being our own
and yet united
continued, flowing, unlimited
by the bonds of societal affection.
our skills and wants and needs
uniquely ours and yet
a part and parcel of the drive
or desire of one whole.

United only by
the touching of our feet.

I recorded a couple of poems last night. This is the first one. 

Also, figured out how to use the transcript feature- have a plain .txt file witht he words in it, and upload it as a transcript. You don’t need to do the timing, Youtube will do it for you!

Better accessibility through technology!